Love > Chaos
Podcast of the Week: Approaching With Kindness by TED Radio Hour on Spotify, by recommendation from peer educator Josh McBeath
Article of the Week: Marry the man you could live without but wouldn't want to , article published by Today's Parenting Team author Jade North.
This week, I was reminded of how important it is to show kindness and accept love.
Rewind back to October, when I was diagnosed with my first concussion. Then slowly through the last three months, where I hazily navigated emotional highs and lows. Having been prideful over the years in my tendency to share in vulnerability, it hasn't been easy to know when these highs and lows were me or the concussion talking. I leaned into my roller coaster in the ways I knew how: prayer, friends/family, and sleep. I knew if I prayed, God would hear me; I knew that my friends and family would comfort me, and that sleep would reset me and nourish me.
This week, I woke up one morning and it was soooo dark outside my windows. I looked at my clock and it was 6:25 AM. Is anyone else sick of this darkness and ready for the sunrise to wake them up again?!
Nonetheless, I laid there and for whatever reason, my mom was on my mind. She does that sometimes. Just drops by for a visit.
I was thinking about how much I loved her and how I loved being a mom because of how she had been as mine. Which was a nice thought to have in that moment because Ainsley's dad had been gone for a couple weeks on a work trip, and I was REALLY feeling the exhaustion of soccer mom/carpool mom/flu mom.... you get the point. :) I appreciate all of you mom's/dad's out there who are doing it alone, away from family or without breaks. YOU are the heroes.
Back to my mom. I was thinking of this love for her and then I thought about the love FROM her. My heart skipped a beat. I was remembering a childhood love from her. Because those adult years had been a little, hard. But in those adult years, it continued to be a love that truly fought for her/us. A love that overcame a lot. A love that fought for her life. She loved me a lot, but I had forgotten that in many moments. And that is when my heart skipped another beat.
Do you ever forget to accept someone's love? Well, I realized in that moment, I have [and do]. I have fought against the kindness and love in many relationships because my experience with accepting love meant it had to be hard and not at face value; but rather with lies, manipulation, and broken trust. And even those things even were unintentional with my mom, if you consider that they perpetuated by substance.
I walked into my day, with a crap ton of gratitude for the way that prayers are answered and who shows up to bless those prayers and love me over and over again. Because let's be real, on this roller coaster, I had been praying for some peace, some hope, and some patience...
Which brings me to why I included podcast and article recommendations at the top. In a meeting with a co-worker down the hall, he shared about a podcast he had just listened to. One about gratitude and kindness. SIGN ME UP! And it did not disappoint! Next, I was sitting and updating some advertising campaigns and saw an article shared by a friend, hence the article for the week. The idea that you marry someone who you physically could live without, but don't want to. YES! Love it!
Both the article and podcast made me think about how we love and accept love. We want to be independent, individual, and strong, but we are created to be loved and love. And accepting that love and how it belongs in our life can be quite difficult. Or figuring out how to consciously think about how we love and show kindness, that can be so messy and almost frustrating in this chaotic world we are living in.
It has been three months since my accident that caused this concussion. I have felt alone at times, confused at times, VERY forgetful at times [oh my gosh, shout out to all my co-workers who have kept me on target and friends who remind me what day it is and who I am]. But most of all, my brain has struggled to pause because it is working so hard to get back to where it was. But this was one of the biggest wins yet. Getting my feet planted back in my heart. What a funny image, but truth is, when I feel most grounded, is when I choose to love and accept that love.
Thanks for reading my messy brain dump! What a way to close out my 30th year. Today definitely does not represent where I thought I would be if you would have asked me a year ago as I closed out my 29th year, but I am ready to bless this year and celebrate all that is to come.
XO,
T
Article of the Week: Marry the man you could live without but wouldn't want to , article published by Today's Parenting Team author Jade North.
This week, I was reminded of how important it is to show kindness and accept love.
Rewind back to October, when I was diagnosed with my first concussion. Then slowly through the last three months, where I hazily navigated emotional highs and lows. Having been prideful over the years in my tendency to share in vulnerability, it hasn't been easy to know when these highs and lows were me or the concussion talking. I leaned into my roller coaster in the ways I knew how: prayer, friends/family, and sleep. I knew if I prayed, God would hear me; I knew that my friends and family would comfort me, and that sleep would reset me and nourish me.
This week, I woke up one morning and it was soooo dark outside my windows. I looked at my clock and it was 6:25 AM. Is anyone else sick of this darkness and ready for the sunrise to wake them up again?!
Nonetheless, I laid there and for whatever reason, my mom was on my mind. She does that sometimes. Just drops by for a visit.
I was thinking about how much I loved her and how I loved being a mom because of how she had been as mine. Which was a nice thought to have in that moment because Ainsley's dad had been gone for a couple weeks on a work trip, and I was REALLY feeling the exhaustion of soccer mom/carpool mom/flu mom.... you get the point. :) I appreciate all of you mom's/dad's out there who are doing it alone, away from family or without breaks. YOU are the heroes.
Back to my mom. I was thinking of this love for her and then I thought about the love FROM her. My heart skipped a beat. I was remembering a childhood love from her. Because those adult years had been a little, hard. But in those adult years, it continued to be a love that truly fought for her/us. A love that overcame a lot. A love that fought for her life. She loved me a lot, but I had forgotten that in many moments. And that is when my heart skipped another beat.
Do you ever forget to accept someone's love? Well, I realized in that moment, I have [and do]. I have fought against the kindness and love in many relationships because my experience with accepting love meant it had to be hard and not at face value; but rather with lies, manipulation, and broken trust. And even those things even were unintentional with my mom, if you consider that they perpetuated by substance.
I walked into my day, with a crap ton of gratitude for the way that prayers are answered and who shows up to bless those prayers and love me over and over again. Because let's be real, on this roller coaster, I had been praying for some peace, some hope, and some patience...
Which brings me to why I included podcast and article recommendations at the top. In a meeting with a co-worker down the hall, he shared about a podcast he had just listened to. One about gratitude and kindness. SIGN ME UP! And it did not disappoint! Next, I was sitting and updating some advertising campaigns and saw an article shared by a friend, hence the article for the week. The idea that you marry someone who you physically could live without, but don't want to. YES! Love it!
Both the article and podcast made me think about how we love and accept love. We want to be independent, individual, and strong, but we are created to be loved and love. And accepting that love and how it belongs in our life can be quite difficult. Or figuring out how to consciously think about how we love and show kindness, that can be so messy and almost frustrating in this chaotic world we are living in.
It has been three months since my accident that caused this concussion. I have felt alone at times, confused at times, VERY forgetful at times [oh my gosh, shout out to all my co-workers who have kept me on target and friends who remind me what day it is and who I am]. But most of all, my brain has struggled to pause because it is working so hard to get back to where it was. But this was one of the biggest wins yet. Getting my feet planted back in my heart. What a funny image, but truth is, when I feel most grounded, is when I choose to love and accept that love.
Thanks for reading my messy brain dump! What a way to close out my 30th year. Today definitely does not represent where I thought I would be if you would have asked me a year ago as I closed out my 29th year, but I am ready to bless this year and celebrate all that is to come.
XO,
T
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